Your guide to Emotional Wellbeing in the Workplace

Have you ever been at work and found yourself being emotionally triggered and then a bit out of control, followed by a bit of guilt, shame or embarrassment? At some point it’s happened to most, if not, all of us.

 

This doesn’t mean emotions don’t belong in the workplace, after all, we are emotional beings.

However, it can be tricky finding the balance between displaying emotions appropriately/intelligently, keeping things to yourself, or letting things go as it’s not a productive use of your time or energy. Sometimes, our default is the easy and comfortable option of pushing things down.

Have you ever tried pushing a beachball under water? It’s possible, but it’s hard and it usually pops back up at some point in an uncontrollable manner!

Pushing a beach ball underwater is like pushing feelings down. Eventually they will come to the surface.

Our feelings, our E-motions – (Energy in Motion), like all energy, are healthiest when flowing. When energy gets stuck, it will look for a way to get going again……

Food for thought:

The law of conservation of energy states that energy cannot be created or destroyed, only transformed from one form to another.

Our emotions are legitimate and they are signals for us to understand, as they are telling us something about ourselves. Forgive me if I’m stating the obvious here. Although it’s worth mentioning that quite often we are only listening to the surface level signal/story they are telling us about ourselves and our reaction to a situation.

While that sinks in, here is some further food for thought that I hope will help you accept your emotions and look at them in a different way, one that will help you:

There is no Yang without Yin

No courage without fear

No light without darkness

No life without death

No relaxation without tension

No happiness without sadness

The conclusion I draw from this and from my life experiences and training, is that negative, unhappy or catabolic energy and emotions aren’t bad and things to be avoided. They are natural and can serve a purpose.

If we can understand the real message emotions are giving us, we have the potential to use this message in a way that is good for us, and good for others. But let’s focus on ourselves first, as the happier healthier stronger we are, the better we are able to show up for others too.

Step One. Acceptance

First things first. Accept your emotions. Feel them, let them be. You may have to get comfortable being uncomfortable here.

Then give yourself time and space to decide what to do with them.

They are signals to better understand yourself. The better you understand yourself, the better you can operate.

Step Two. Listening & Understanding.

Now that you have some space and time from your emotions (even if just five minutes) ask yourself:

• What is your emotional response telling you about yourself?
• Is it time to let go of something you’ve been holding on to?
• Are you misinterpreting a situation?
• Is this a time to stay quiet and let go or voice your opinion of how you’re feeling?
• How can we use them as fuel for positive action?

Your emotions might or probably will be painful. This pain is short term, and is better than the alternative of avoiding them, which will be far more painful in the long run, and the pain will last for longer and run deeper.

Write the emotions you are experiencing down without judgement. Look to understand them. Give yourself time and space for this process.

Let them go or let them flow.

Step Three. Taking Control – Action.

Here are some practices that will help you short and long term:

 

Tool kit for in the moment

• Walk away from the situation that has triggered an emotional response.
• Ask for time and space – Have a stock phrase to say to others to make it easy for you in the moment.
• Breathe calmly, softly, deeply.

 

Toolkit for right after

• Keep breathing as above
• Let it all out with a big sigh
• Have a word with yourself – your mantra – “I’m calm and letting go”. “This is not important and is draining my energy” Or whatever resonates with you that will help – tell yourself you are in control.
• Change your environment as soon as you can, this will help you psychologically shift your energy.

 

Toolkit for long term sustainability

Start with you. The only thing you can control is you and your response to the world

Write down your emotions – how you’re feeling, why you think you’re feeling this way

Be curious. Be brave, have that difficult conversation with yourself.

• What’s really going on?
• What are you not addressing?
• What are holding onto?
• How could you interpret the situation in a different way?

Be kind to yourself. The kinder you are to yourself the more chance you have of experiencing things different, in a more positive way.

 

Exercises to try:

How would you like to respond in the future and moving forwards? What do you need to address or do to allow this to happen? Design your future response.

 

Move forwards with intention.

What’s a goal for the week that will help you? It could be to focus on one of the tools above.

What’s one thing you can do today to move you forwards.

Close your eyes, breathe deeply and slowly for a couple of minutes and ask yourself, what’s the first thing I need to do that is going to help me? What’s the first thing that pops into your head? Your intuitive response, your gut. Not your mind, as your mind often seeks the easy solution to avoid discomfort, and whilst that helps short term, it doesn’t address anything for positive change in the long term.

 

Suppressed Emotions

Almost every single cell in our body has the capacity to hold emotion. As a species, we are very good at holding on to emotions and things from the past, unconsciously and subconsciously.  It’s a protective mechanism when we are not ready to deal with something in the moment, and so we bury it and move on. But carrying that with you through life will be affecting your energy as well as your view points and how you’re interacting with life. This could be causing you stress and tension you’re not aware of. This is where practices like the Wim Hof Method and the WHM Breathwork can help release that buried tension. By getting your body and mind into a deep state of relaxation, you’re able to let things bubble up to the surface and let go.

Whether you are at work or at home emotions can be unsettling. They are energy intensive and you have a limited supply of energy each day. Could you benefit from finding a more sustainable solution to your emotions and energy?

You can check out the workshops and one2one support I offer here:

https://www.adaptandflow.co.uk/pricing/

If something catchings your eye, please get in touch and we can have a chat about whether these are the right tools for you and your teams.

Could your business benefit from using stress and energy as tools for improved health, wellbeing, performance and resilience?

I am here to help you and your teams become happier, healthier and stronger.

All the love and all the power

Damon

xx